On Religion

family life

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A Catholic parish dared to discuss smartphones – on Sunday, after Mass (Part II)

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A Catholic parish dared to discuss smartphones -- on Sunday, after Mass (Part II)

Professionals who sell technology are used to events in which they display their goods and explain why they are important.

But the scene was different at Our Lady of Mount Carmel Catholic Church in Carmel, Indiana, on a Sunday a few weeks before Christmas. After each Mass, the faithful could enter the parish hall and meet representatives of companies that sell "dumb phones," mobile devices without unlimited access to the Internet.

Most active Catholic parents have already been exposed to the national debates about smartphones on the mental health of young children and teens, said parishioner Lauren Clark, who helped organize the event. The question is whether churches should get involved.

"Lots of parents are on board … but they don't know what they can do," she said, reached by telephone. "They still feel like they need – thinking about safety – some way to keep in touch with their kids."

Parents also worry about arguing with their children, or other parents, about these decisions. And while they worry about the impact of smartphones on their children, they worry about what will happen if their children unplug from the digital culture of their peers.

"Parents know that social media is more dangerous than the technology itself," said Clark. "But if kids have that smartphone, there's really no way to keep them off social media. It's a critical mass situation. ...

"You get them that smartphone to avoid conflict. But when you open that door, you're going to face many other conflicts. Can I get Instagram? Can I get on TikTok? That smartphone is not a neutral object. It's a tool."

Religious groups need to get involved, said the researcher at the heart of these debates. Jonathan Haidt of New York University, author of "The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness," is a self-avowed Jewish atheist. Nevertheless, he has found that Orthodox Jewish educators are the leaders most willing to work with him.

Orthodox Jews know they will clash with the culture around them, he said, in an interview this past fall. Other religious leaders need to face that reality.

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What happened when clergy were offered help on the smartphone crisis? (Part I)

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What happened when clergy were offered help on the smartphone crisis? (Part I)

As the CEO of a company that sells family friendly mobile phones, Bill Brady thought it was safe to assume that many believers in religious sanctuaries and schools would want alternatives to handing their kids smartphones.

After comparing Troomi data with a national consumer database, he saw that his clients were more religious, more educated and more conservative on moral, cultural and political issues. Then again, a high percentage of these families were in the Northeast – not a region known as a "hotbed of religion," he said.

"Certainly, there are people with a strong faith background that are very conscious of trying to keep their kids out of pornography, for example. They have strong moral reasons for that," he said, in a telephone interview.

Thus, Brady decided to create an outreach program to work with religious organizations, trying to create bridges to companies that market what are often called "dumb phones" – mobile devices without open doors to social media and the Internet. The Troomi phone is built on an Android-based operating system and includes moderated forms of texting and some aps, such as map-and-traffic programs.

"The church needs to be playing a leadership role," said Brady. "What I know from my conversations with faith leaders is that they are concerned. … I know that they are worried about kids zoning out on screens and not making time in their lives for God. I know that they are worried about the stress and the anxiety and depression. …

“But all parents love their children. All parents want their children to be happy and healthy and protected from bullies and protected from predators."

The question was whether religious leaders would act on their concerns.

In the fall of 2024, Brady's research team created a national mailing list of 1,200 "faith leaders" and religious organizations – including 600 specific pastors. Most, but not all, of these contacts were with Christian organizations.

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No, seriously: Jeff Foxworthy is convinced that God has a sense of humor

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No, seriously: Jeff Foxworthy is convinced that God has a sense of humor

As a rule, Jeff Foxworthy never refuses autograph requests, but the redneck comedy legend hit a wall during a funeral-home visitation for someone in his extended family.

"When you go to a funeral home, a lot of times there's more than one visitation going on," said Foxworthy, reached by telephone. "Across the hall, there was another one … and it was a rowdy bunch. In the break area they had coolers with cans of regular Budweiser. …

"At some point in the evening, somebody over there recognized me and they started coming into our side and wanting to get a picture made. You know, 'Can I get my picture with you?' … And one turned into three and that turned into seven or eight."

Then a woman arrived with a felt-tip marker and made a familiar request: "Can I ask you a favor?' … Can you sign my brother's tie?'"

Seeking an escape door back to his family, Foxworthy said: "'Where's your brother?' And she said, 'He's in here, in the casket.' And that's the only time I have ever denied somebody an autograph. … But asking me to climb up on the casket and autograph the guy's tie?"

The truth in this sobering parable is that humor often surfaces during life's big transitions, even when they involve sacred beliefs and traditions. That's one reason Foxworthy has never written "You Might Be A Redneck Churchgoer If" jokes.

Yes, audiences would yowl with laughter, especially in zip codes defined by faith, family, food and fishing. But for some people, religion jokes would cut too close to the bone, said Foxworthy.

After four decades in comedy, he said that he reminds himself, that "everybody I'm going to look at tonight is going through some kind of a struggle. It might be financial, it might be physical, it may be emotional. … I'm like, 'Just be kind to people.' You know? Have grace. You don't know their story. And I don't think humor makes people's struggles go away. But I do think … if you're able to laugh and set that burden down for a little bit, it almost, like, recharges you to where you can pick it back up and go deal with it."

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Chaplains: Helping the suffering journey from the "Why?" to the "When?"

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Chaplains: Helping the suffering journey from the "Why?" to the "When?"

The chaplain's prayer is posted near the chapel of Baptist Hospital in Beaumont, Texas, a space shared by patients, families, visitors, doctors and the whole staff.

"Dear God, who makest thyself known in deeds rather than in mere words, deepen within us respect and appreciation for opportunities to serve. Thou has promised aid and blessing where men deal justly, show mercy, and serve humbly. Give us a faithfulness to our task, a patience in anxiety, added skill in work done. Add to our wills a readiness to follow thy guidance; to our hearts a compassion like unto the Great Physician who ministered in love and without favor."

The prayer was written by the Rev. Weldon Langley, the hospital's chaplain from 1960 to 1985. Langley continued part-time until 1993, completing four decades of chaplaincy work with Baptist institutions on the Texas Gulf Coast. He died in 2013 at the age of 96.

Langley's prayer has retained its strategic location as the hospital complex expanded into new, updated facilities.

"Weldon was a chaplain to the patients and their families, but he was also a pastor – year after year – to the doctors, nurses and everybody else," said the Rev. David Cross, who followed Langley at Baptist Hospital. While Langley focused on the needs of patients, "his insights into what makes life worth living made him a shepherd for everyone. He was a chaplain's chaplain."

Every year, the Global Chaplains Alliance dedicates the first Saturday of February to honoring chaplains. For me, it's impossible to discuss the ministry of chaplains without mentioning my "Uncle Weldon" Langley, who was very close to my father, the Rev. Bert Mattingly, who also had experience as a chaplain. My father died in 1999.

Chaplains work with hospitals, hospices, military units, legislatures, schools, sports teams, corporations, prisons and police and fire departments. Many, but not all, are ordained ministers. For most Americans, the chaplains they know best serve in the nation's 6,000 or more hospitals.

Pastors visit the sick and dying from their own congregations, noted Cross. For hospital chaplains, this is the heart of their work – every day.

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Life lessons (along with some parables) in the classic comedy 'A Christmas Story'

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Life lessons (along with some parables) in the classic comedy 'A Christmas Story'

Humorist Jean Shepherd was a teen-ager when his father came home from work and began packing a suitcase.

"What are ya doin', Dad?", asked Shepherd.

Describing the scene to communication scholar Quentin Schultze, he said that his father replied: "I'm leaving. You'll understand when you get older."

Shepherd's father moved away and married a "trophy wife."

This wasn't the kind of dark, life-changing event that tends to inspire a crucial symbol and theme in a beloved Christmas movie, noted Schultze. But Shepherd wove parts of his own life story into his storytelling, including work that became "A Christmas Story."

Americans who watch this 1983 family comedy – about 40 million click into the 24-hour marathon on TBS and TNT, starting on Christmas Eve – know that it centers on a boy named Ralphie who is obsessed with his parents giving him a 200-shot Red Ryder air rifle BB gun.

But another iconic image is the leg-shaped lamp, wearing a fishnet stocking worthy of a bordello, that Ralphie's "Old Man" received as his "major award" after winning a quiz contest. What was that all about?

Schultze learned the answer when, for three years in the 1980s, he taught a college-level storytelling class with Shepherd, while saving notebooks full of insights from their time together.

"As Shepherd told me, the leg lamp became the Old Man's trophy wife, which he had to show off to the world. He was unable to carry on his 'affair' with discretion," wrote Schultze, in "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out! Life Lessons from the movie 'A Christmas Story.'" He is now professor emeritus at Calvin University in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

The quest for the Red Ryder rifle has a heartwarming final act, with a boy bonding with his volatile "Old Man," the father's only name in the script. And the leg lamp story also has a happy ending, even though it's clear that Ralphie's mother broke it on purpose.

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Christmas in the mountains of North Carolina: Leaning into faith after the flood

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Christmas in the mountains of North Carolina: Leaning into faith after the flood

Christmas is a good news, bad news situation in Pensacola, a tiny community in the Cane River Valley high in the mountains of North Carolina.

The good news is that Hurricane Helene flooding – which washed away almost everything at the town's crossroads – was followed by waves of volunteers and relief shipments from churches, nonprofits and businesses large and small. Most of the Laurel Branch Baptist Church survived, in part because a bus-sized RV was swept into the front of the sanctuary, which diverted some of the raging floodwaters.

The bad news? While conditions are improving, many face Christmas in badly damaged houses, loaned mobile homes or worse. It's hard to put a Christmas tree inside a tent. And what happens if early snows and winds cripple the patched-up power lines?

"We've got people giving us Christmas on top of Christmas on top of Christmas. That's not the issue. We appreciate the generosity, but we have problems that are bigger than presents under a tree," said the Rev. Bradley Boone, pastor of Concord Baptist Church in nearby Burnsville. That's the county seat of rugged Yancey County, the location of Mount Mitchell – the tallest peak east of the Mississippi River.

Pensacola is just one of many battered small towns along the matrix of rivers and creeks cut into the Blue Ridge and Great Smoky Mountains. Recent AccuWeather estimates for Helene damages have approached $250 billion. North Carolina lost at least 100 state bridges and more than 5,000 privately owned bridges.

The Boone roots run deep in the Cane River Valley, since he's in the seventh generation of a family tree topped by the legendary frontiersman Daniel Boone and his brothers. Pastor Boone is a veteran leader in the Pensacola Volunteer Fire Department, which was the hub for rescue work during and after Helene, as well as the ongoing relief efforts.

Boone's own home was damaged by one of the 2,000 landslides in the North Carolina mountains. The road to his house looked like it had been bombed.

Pensacola is part of my own story, since I have three decades of ties there with family, friends and neighbors.

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The mysteries of Our Lady of Guadalupe: It's a story for researchers and childen

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The mysteries of Our Lady of Guadalupe: It's a story for researchers and childen

The cloak worn by St. Juan Diego Cuauhtlatoatzin was made from rough cactus materials from central Mexico and it should have deteriorated after 15-30 years.

But this "tilma" remains intact and its mysterious image of the Virgin Mary has not faded since December 1531, when the indigenous peasant reported a series of Marian encounters. The framed cloak is displayed behind the high altar of the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe at the foot of Tepeyac Hill in Mexico City.

Scientists have studied the cloak for centuries. For starters, it's hard to describe the survival of this cactus-fiber cloak without using the word "miracle."

"We are dealing with mysterious events, but that doesn't mean they aren't real," said Vivian Dudro, a senior editor at Ignatius Press who helped produce a new edition of "The Lady of Guadalupe," a classic children's book by the late artist Tomie dePaola.

"All I know is that historians and scientists keep digging into the details of all this. Even with what we call 'legends,' you soon realize that there are real people involved in stories of this kind," she said, in a telephone interview. "The story of Our Lady of Guadalupe is best described as 'sacred history,' and pieces of this history continue to emerge to this day."

Year after year, Juan Diego's tilma is viewed by an estimated 20 million pilgrims, with more than 10 million visiting the basilica close to December 12 – the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, the patron saint of Mexico and the Americas. Around the world, throngs march in parades and sacred processions behind copies of this iconic Marian image.

While Our Lady of Guadalupe has played a central role in Mexico's tempestuous history, Pope Francis has stressed that this image should not be tethered to culture and politics. "The message of Guadalupe does not tolerate any ideology of any kind," he said, during last year's Vatican rites for the feast day. Instead, believers should focus on Mary's question to Juan Diego: "Am I not here, I, who am your mother?"

This is a key message, said Dudro, that children need to hear when parents and teachers introduce them to the story of Juan Diego, the Castilian roses he plucked – following Mary's instructions – from the frozen soil and, finally, the image of her that appeared on his cloak when the roses spilled out before the Franciscan bishop of Mexico.

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Why are most clergy timid about smartphone wars? They fear offending parents

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Why are most clergy timid about smartphone wars? They fear offending parents

As the star of the scathing documentary "Religulous" – "religious" plus "ridiculous" – Bill Maher has never hidden his agnostic views about faith.

But that doesn't mean the stand-up comic doubts the reality of evil. Consider this blistering comment on smartphones, drawn from his "Real Time" talk show earlier this year.

Far too many people think "they don't need reality," Maher told social psychologist Jonathan Haidt of New York University, author of "The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness."

"We've made reality obsolete – interesting choice," said Maher. "Parents today, it's kind of the worst of both worlds. Too much hovering in real life, where there is any left, and then none with virtual. You go in your room, lock yourself in there with the portal of evil, that is the phone. … I feel like parents, in each generation, ceded more control to children."

In response, Haidt – a self-avowed Jewish atheist – stressed that modern life continues to eat away at the traditions of the past.

"As life gets easier, as people get wealthier, as they move away from the old days, authority tends to decay – there tends to be less respect for authority, less respect for the old ways," said Haidt. "Kids need structure, they need moral rules. … When it seems as though anything is permissible, it doesn't make people happy. It makes them feel disoriented and lost."

Maher has made it clear that he is "not a tech enthusiast," noted Emily Harrison, in her "Dear Christian Parent" Substack newsletter. But the shocker in that HBO exchange was his claim that smartphones serve as a "portal of evil" in daily life.

"Wait. What? … Yes, smartphones can do lots of great things, but they also have made the proliferation of pornography mind boggling large," wrote Harrison. After all, five years ago, PornHub was already reporting 115,000,000 visits "per day with smartphones accounting for almost 84% of their online traffic. So, is the smartphone a 'portal of evil'? Yeah, I'd say so."

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Pope Francis offers strategic words on cats, dogs, babies and interfaith life in Indonesia

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Pope Francis offers strategic words on cats, dogs, babies and interfaith life in Indonesia

It was the kind of quote that, when said by the right person under the right conditions, would inspire bold headlines.

"Your country ... has families with three, four or five children," Pope Francis told President Joko Widodo of Indonesia. "Keep it up, you're an example for everyone, for all the countries that maybe … these families prefer to have a cat or a little dog instead of a child."

The pope's words didn't draw much flak, especially when compared with the media firestorm when critics resurrected a 2021 barb by U.S. Senate candidate J.D. Vance, an adult convert to Catholicism.

"We are effectively run, in this country … by a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own life and the choices that they have made," Vance told Tucker Carlson on Fox News. Maybe America could do more, he added, "to support more people who actually have kids."

Vance, of course, is now in a hot spotlight as the GOP choice for vice president. The pro-natalist views of Pope Francis, meanwhile, drew warm praise in Indonesia, the world's largest Islamic nation.

Visiting an often tense land – with a population that is 87% Muslim, and 3% Catholic – the pope did everything he could to praise the beliefs and traditions of his hosts. In that context, his pro-family views were welcomed.

The pope also praised Indonesia's more moderate approach to religious life, although the government has strengthened laws against blasphemy and apostasy and some local officials, in this vast and complex archipelago, have been stricter than others when enforcing sharia law. Also, there have been occasional terrorism threats, including what officials decided was an attempted ISIS plot against Pope Francis.

In a speech to public officials and diplomats, the pope pressed for renewed interfaith dialogues, stressing that this would be an indispensable way of "countering extremism and intolerance, which through the distortion of religion attempt to impose their views by using deception and violence."